Is Romance a Euphamism for Lust or is it good old Courtship?

Helen Fisher the Biological Anthropologist

Her PDF “Defining the Brain System of Lust, Romantic Attraction and Attachment [jump to link here]

A good read “Separating Lust and Love” [jump to link]

Here is a title in the Metro: 

TOWIE’s Gemma Collins hoping for holiday romance in I’m A Celebrity 2014 jungle

Newly single Gemma Collins admits she is using the I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here! jungle to escape from her troubles at home after she was allegedly beaten up by her boyfriend.
The TOWIE star, who landed in Australia last night, says she is hoping for a ‘holiday romance’ in the Outback after her weekend split from ex-convict boyfriend Alexander Moss.

Here is How Stuff Works

Types/Stages of Love: Lust and Attraction

There are three distinct types or stages of “love”:

  1. Lust, or erotic passion
  2. Attraction, or romantic passion
  3. Attachment, or commitment

When all three of these happen with the same person, you have a very strong bond. Sometimes, however, the one we lust after isn’t the one we’re actually in love with.

LustWhen we’re teenagers, just after puberty, estrogen and testosterone become active in our bodies for the first time and create the desire to experience “love.” These desires, a.k.a. lust, play a big role both during puberty and throughout our lives. According to an article by Lisa Diamond, entitled “Love and Sexual Desire” (Current Directions in Psychological Science, vol 13 no. 3), lust and romantic love are two different things caused by different underlying substrates. Lust evolved for the purpose of sexual mating, while romantic love evolved because of the need for infant/child bonding. So even though we often experience lust for our romantic partner, sometimes we don’t — and that’s okay. Or, maybe we do, but we also lust after someone else. According to Dr. Diamond, that’s normal.

Sexologist John Money draws the line between love and lust in this way: “Love exists above the belt, lust below. Love is lyrical. Lust is lewd.”

Pheromones, looks and our own learned predispositions for what we look for in a mate play an important role in whom we lust after, as well. Without lust, we might never find that special someone. But, while lust keeps us “looking around,” it is our desire for romance that leads us to attraction.

AttractionWhile the initial feelings may (or may not) come from lust, what happens next — if the relationship is to progress — is attraction. When attraction, or romantic passion, comes into play, we often lose our ability to think rationally — at least when it comes to the object of our attraction. The old saying “love is blind” is really accurate in this stage. We are often oblivious to any flaws our partner might have. We idealize them and can’t get them off our minds. This overwhelming preoccupation and drive is part of our biology. We’ll go deeper into the chemicals involved in attraction in The Chemistry of Love.

In this stage, couples spend many hours getting to know each other. If this attraction remains strong and is felt by both of them, then they usually enter the third stage: attachment. The Romance of Lust


Think it’s only the ignorant are #racist? Here’s Prof Spurr an example of supremacism

Prof Spurr racism
prof-spurr racism Image courtesy of

A university lecturer was suspended today after he sent a string of highly-derogatory emails attacking other cultures, sexes and religions over more than two years. 

Professor Barry Spurr, from University of Sydney, describes Aboriginal people as “human rubbish tips” and “Abos” while complaining against the inclusion of their culture in education and politics.

The poetry expert, who advises the Australian government on reforming the English literature curriculum, attacked people of different cultural and socio-economic backgrounds by using offensive terms such as “Mussies”, “Chinky-Poos”, “bogans” and “fatsoes”.

He calls Nelson Mandela a “darkie” and Desmond Tutu a “witch doctor”; describes women as “whores”; and shockingly stated that a victim of a sexual attack needs more than just “penis” put in her mouth, before it’s “stitched up”.

British people were also described as “the scum of the earth” in emails sent from September 2012 to date, to around 12 people including senior academics and officials at the university.

A rally yesterday saw students protest on the campus for the immediate sacking of Professor Spurr.

He yesterday defended his choice of words, telling New Matilda they were intended to mock the “very extreme language” used.

He said: “The comments that you refer to are largely to one recipient with whom I have had a whimsical linguistic game for many years of trying to outdo one another in extreme statements.

“These statements are not reflections of my views or his.”

The Students’ Representative Council’s education officer, Ridah Hassan, said the emails had been met with outrage from students.

She said: “Such vile, bigotry belongs back in the 1950s and it has no place at Sydney University.”

The professor argued that the curriculum should focus more on western civilisation and Judeo-Christian culture in a government report that was strongly supported by Christopher Pyne, the Minister for Education.

He also tells university colleagues and friends that 95 per cent of Australian students should not be studying in higher education, and bemoans that that view could be “derided as elitist, fascist, misogynist – the usual litany”.

His contribution to the curriculum review also suggested that Aboriginal writers’ presence in Australia’s literary tradition is “minimal”, despite him petitioning against their inclusion.

A spokesperson for Education Minister Christopher Pyne denied the government had anything to do with the appointment of Professor Spurr.

They said: “The appointment was not made by the Government. The Minister and his office had no input into the selection of any subject expert.”

“The Minister utterly rejects and finds repugnant the denigration of any minority on the basis of their sex, race, sexual orientation or beliefs,” he added.


SOURCE: Independent

Australia’s history never read. Blackman keeps it in his head

John Pilger – The Secret Country – The First Australians Fight Back [1985]


1985. The shameful history of persecution of the Aborigines in Australia. – Australia: The Secret Country – By John Pilger – 28 November 2009
… The previous, openly racist government’s “intervention” into Aboriginal lands in the Northern Territory is being consolidated. In 2007, on the pretext that Aboriginal children were being sexually abused in “unthinkable numbers”, the government of John Howard suspended the Racial Discrimination Act and sent the army and “business managers” to take over black communities.
Within a year, barely reported statistics revealed how bogus it all was. Out of 7433 Aboriginal children examined by doctors, a maximum of four possible cases of sexual abuse were identified. The Australian Crimes Commission found no evidence of paedophile rings. What they found they already knew: poverty and sickness on the scale of Africa and India. …
The Indigenous affairs minister, Jenny Macklin, has decreed that unless certain communities hand over their precious freehold leases they will be denied basic services. The Northern Territory contains abundant mineral wealth, such as uranium, and has long been eyed by multinationals as a lucrative radioactive waste dump. …
… the rate of incarceration of black Australians is five times that of South Africa during the last years of apartheid. The state of Western Australia imprisons Aboriginal men at eight times the apartheid figure, an Aussie world record.
On 16 November, a 12-year-old Aboriginal boy appeared in court charged with receiving a Freddo Frog chocolate bar from a friend who had allegedly taken it from a supermarket. The supermarket did not seek prosecution. Only the international headlines forced the police to drop the case. Two thirds of Aboriginal children who have contact with the police are jailed; two thirds of white children are cautioned. A young Aboriginal man was jailed for a year for stealing £12 worth of biscuits and soft drink. …
While I have been in Australia, Irene Khan, Amnesty’s secretary general, an experienced witness of poverty and discrimination, has been travelling through the vast outback region known as Utopia. The roads are dirt; water trickles from a single standpipe in many communities. She saw children, their eyes streaming and coughs hacking. She met Elsie, who sleeps on a mattress in the desert, yet pays rent to the government. Shocking, she says.
There is currently a liberal clarion call in Australia for a Bill of Rights, and the republican movement is stirring again. These debates are meaningless until white Australia summons the moral and political imagination to offer its first people a genuine treaty, as well as universal land rights and a proper share of the country’s resources. And respect. Only then will this fortunate society earn the respect it so often craves by other means. or

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Good Contextual reading [Axis of]

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Gang Rape! Men Released? WHY?

A TEN Year old girl consents to physical penetrative sex. WHAT! You must be kidding.

Court transcripts have been released involving a controversial Cape York child rape case.

The documents show prosecutors described the assault as “generally consensual” sex.


Earlier this year, six boys and three men pleaded guilty to the 2005 gang-rape of the then 10-year-old girl in the Indigenous community of Aurukun.

Are you a bit astounded by the decision of this court, or has the little girl’s life have no meaning in that little community.


At all times, we need to be mindful of the relative context. This was after all the indegenous community of Aurkun.

The customs and cultures of the local community should be respected, as well as, the laws of the land. But there rises in us a desire to be critical, as much as we would love to criticize, any fool can and most fools do.
We need to be considerate to the local customs and practices. Yet strive as we might, to remain objective and calm, there comes a point when you just have to raise your voice and condemn this inhumane treatment of a child.

Yes a 10yr old is a child, with all the innocence of a child.

To claim that the act was consensual, beggars belief.

Meanwhile, the Queensland Government says it has learnt from the system failures that led to Child Safety officers returning the girl to Aurukun.

Premier Anna Bligh says the officers made the wrong decision in removing the child from foster care, and sending her back to Aurukun.

But she says action was taken.

“Disciplining the officers involved moving the child and changing and improving our response in Aboriginal communities,” she said.

The Opposition’s Mark McArdle says the case is the latest in a long line of child safety failures.

“These issues continue to occur,” he said.

Queensland’s Attorney-General Kerry Shine is appealing the sentences given to the nine offenders, and the Director of Public Prosecutions, Leanne Clare, is reviewing about 75 similar cases.

Good to know they are coming to terms with their own attitudes and failings.

These officers need training and they need it fast!

“I think in a country where they’re asking the Aboriginal people to trust the system, trust that the right thing will be done to do away with customary law and to focus on protecting children – they didn’t protect this child in this particular, and they took away the face of the Aboriginal community to trust the system.”

The case has had a ripple effect through other Aboriginal communities in the north of the state.



Astounded by that case in Australia? Are you, how about this one? The Qatif Rape Case.

The woman was initially punished for violating laws on segregation of the sexes –
she was in an unrelated man’s car at the time of the attack.
When she appealed, judges doubled her sentence, saying she had been trying
to use the media to influence them.

Her lawyer has been suspended from the case and faces a disciplinary session.

Abdel Rahman al-Lahem told the BBC Arabic Service that the sentence was in violation of Islamic law:
“My client is the victim of this abhorrent crime. I believe her sentence contravenes the Islamic Sharia law
and violates the pertinent international conventions,” he said.
“The judicial bodies should have dealt with this girl as the victim rather than the culprit.”

The lawyer also said that his client would appeal against the decision to increase her punishment.

Segregation laws
According to the Arab News newspaper, the 19-year-old woman was gang-raped
14 times in an attack in Qatif in the eastern province a year-and-a-half ago.

Seven men were found guilty of the rape and sentenced to prison terms
ranging from just under a year to five years.

The victim and attackers are from Saudi Arabia’s Shia minority.

This particular incident has been covered by others and one such is  Hanie
from lifeisonebigstage,  

when she commented on Urbansemiotic 


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